Monday, June 16, 2014

June Hope Chest- Hope Is No Accident by Annabelle Suddreth

As a child, I noticed there were few pictures of me as a baby.  The first picture I saw of myself was when I was around five years old.  When I finally mustered the courage to ask my mom if I was adopted, she burst into laughter.  She explained that her hands were quite full when I came along.  
You see, my mom’s first child, Paul, was born blind and learning disabled, so the doctor recommended having a second child to help the first child develop skills such as eating, talking and walking.  364 days after Paul was born, my brother, Ben, came into the world.  
Three years after that, just as my parents completed the construction of a new home, they got the unexpected news:  mom was pregnant again.  
Three children in four and a half years.  Bless her heart.
That explained everything. It not only rationalized why there were no pictures of me as an infant and toddler, it also clarified why my father often told people I was an accident - and he said it a lot.
When we hear something about ourselves repeatedly, eventually we start believing it.  The comments can be positive, “You did a great job - you are awesome,” or negative like “You’re an accident - you weren’t part of the plan.”  The message becomes a song we play over and over in our head until it becomes our reality.
What is the recording that plays in your head? 
For almost four decades, the “accident” song played in my head.  But it didn’t just stay there.  That recording permeated my entire being: my heart, my soul, my gut.  Believing I was unplanned, I reacted by being a people-pleaser and an overachiever.
How have you reacted to your “song”?  Did you try compliance and overcompensation?  Maybe you chose the path of rebellion, taking risks and doing things you knew weren’t right. I did some of that as well.
Fortunately, somewhere along my journey, someone cared enough about me to tell me about God.  Not the “thou shalt”, rules-based God that I’d heard about my entire life, but God, the loving Father.  
In my quest to learn more, I uncovered Psalm 139:13-16, where David says to God:
13 For you created my inmost being;
    you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
    your works are wonderful,
    I know that full well.
15 My frame was not hidden from you
    when I was made in the secret place,
    when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.
16 Your eyes saw my unformed body;
    all the days ordained for me were written in your book
    before one of them came to be.”
This scripture was life-changing for me.  I wept as I read that God ordained my life before I was ever conceived, realizing for the first time in my life that I’m not an accident.  I was part of a plan all along – God’s plan!  
I learned that God himself knit and wove me together.  Those words paint such beautiful imagery of the Master carefully and painstakingly binding me together – a far different picture from an accidental interlude.
As if it couldn’t get any better, the words “fearfully and wonderfully made” leapt off the page. Never had I heard such deep and positive affirmations, finally turning down the volume on the music blaring for decades. 

Periodically, I still need reminding that I am a part of God’s plan.  That “accident” recording pops up every once in a while but I am now able to go back to this demonstration of God’s love and grace.
I pray this verse is a blessing to you also.  Try re-reading Psalm 139:13-16, this time personalizing it by saying it directly to God.  By realizing that you are God’s planned creation, these verses might just silence the negative recordings in your life, too.

1 comment:

  1. Awesome - thanks for sharing! I've not been good at New year's resolutions but hoping to do better this year. I'm hoping to live out Thessalonians 5:16-18:
    Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.