And He said, "This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one."
I saw the picture above on Pinterest and it really spoke to me. We, parents, always hear that our children are watching and learning. When those children get to be teenagers and young adults, what have they learned about marriage by observing us? It’s a scary thought. When it's time to choose a spouse, it's one of the most important decisions they will make. It not only affects their future, but the future of our families as well.
When discussing this topic, we discovered that many of us had grandparents who prayed consistently for us in this area. I remember my grandmother telling me that she was praying about that, and at the time I didn’t think much of it, but I am so thankful for it now. Today, I pray about this daily for my children. It is important for them to know that God does care about this, and while they might be like the young me and not think much of it, hopefully they will be thankful one day too. We wish we could just protect our children from making poor decisions to avoid the pain that comes with the consequences, but we can’t. So, we have to do what we are called to do which is to pray unceasingly for them, and set an example through our own marriages. We have no idea what lies before us. It could be sickness, job loss, moving, etc. Our kids notice how we handle these situations and where we find our strength.
Marriage can be a beautiful union when both people share the same faith in God. This is important so that when issues come up, both people take them to the Lord to be resolved instead of getting advice from the world. Unfortunately, in our current society, the corruption of the family unit, starting with the marriage is so twisted and tossed around in the public eye that we are constantly bombarded with news of infidelity among celebrities. If someone better comes along, and catches your eye, divorce is considered “doable” if you have the support of your friends and family. Hold up and wait a minute! Your family and friends are NOT in your marriage unless you’ve let them in by complaining and gossiping about flaws, mistakes, and bad habits. These actions do not reflect leaving your parents and clinging to your significant other.
What can we do?
· Stress the importance of sharing the same beliefs and of respecting people. Let them know that you can’t change people. God can, but the person has to be willing to be changed.
· Pray for the protection of our own marriages daily, asking God to help us love unconditionally and selflessly.
· Make sure your actions toward your husband- both privately and publicly are respectful and loving.
· Let your children know that your priorities are: God first, marriage second, kids next.
Keep the lines of communication open with your kids about their relationships. Be honest with them and share your experiences. They might not “hear it” but they are listening. Pray that you find the right words to say and even though they might bring home a few “toads” along the way, ask God to protect their hearts, their purity, and their character until He reveals the one that He has chosen for them.
Passages to Ponder:
2 Corinthians 6:14- Don’t team up with those who are unbelievers. How can righteousness be a partner with wickedness? How can light live with darkness?
Ecclesiastes 4:9-10- Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble.
Jams 5:16- Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results.
Contributors: Monica Brown, Kathy Derda, Jodi Dunbar, Kim McClure and Kristy Tolley