The Remedy for Revenge

Recently, I had a conversation with a friend and was surprised when she mentioned that she was getting tired of waiting on karma to kick in on a former friend of hers.  She went on to say that it wasn’t fair how this person treats people and just gets away with it.  

Have you ever felt that way?  Most of us can say, yes.

Revenge is an ugly thing.  Wanting to see it happen to someone, or even taking the steps to “pay someone back” can consume you, and not in a good way.  It can turn a good-hearted person into someone unrecognizable in the snap of a finger, and what lies behind it?  Usually, it stems from betrayal.

Betrayal is difficult.  When you trust someone with a part of yourself, and that trust is broken, there is a piece that can never be replaced.  When we are betrayed, it can break your heart, rock your confidence in discernment and make it really difficult to trust people.  It isn’t an easy thing to get over.  

Beyond the pain, revenge can seem like the perfect answer, but it isn’t.  Seeking revenge brings nothing but empty, hollow feelings of vindictiveness and regret.  And in the end, that is just making you feel worse and allowing that person to continue to have control over you.

We can want justice for a ‘wrong” done to us so deeply that we can awaken to realize that we are even dreaming about the situation, meaning that there is no escape..not even in our sleep.  

What is the remedy for this rampant emotion that will ravage us if we don’t reject its power?

Forgiveness.  

Yes, forgiveness is the remedy to revenge.  It isn’t easy to do, as a matter of fact, it’s downright difficult to forgive someone who has intentionally set out to hurt you, but the more you allow yourself to get worked up about wanting “justice”, you are just creating more pain for yourself.  

What are the keys to this magical remedy?

• Be patient-  The Bible tell us that we reap what we sow, and it is full of examples of that being played out.  When I am hurt, I want that other person to hurt just as badly, or more and I want it NOW, but God tells us that vengeance is His.  It is His, not ours.  Our job is to love and forgive and trust Him to take care of us.

• Take some steps back- When I watch a tv show, and a police officer draws their weapon, they always say, “Step away from the (whatever)..”  This can be a healthy thing for us to do in life, step away from the trigger that causes us to feel these emotions.

• Turn away from the situation- Stop focusing on all of the details of what has been done to you, and focus on Jesus.  Look into His word, spend some time with Him in prayer and let it all out.  He can take it.  The peace that He will place in your heart and in your life will fulfill you more than wanting revenge ever could.

Passages to Ponder:

Matthew 7:12- Do to others whatever you would like them to do to you.  This is the essence of all that is taught in the Law and the prophets.

Psalm 37:7- Be still in the presence of the Lord, and wait patiently for Him to act.  Don’t worry about evil people who prosper or fret about their wicked schemes.

I Peter 3:9- Don’t repay evil for evil.  Don’t retaliate with insults when people insult you.  Instead, pay them back with a blessing.  That is what God has called you to do, and He will bless you for it.

Contributors:  Karen Bromby, Catherine Caracio, Susan Haynes and Kim McClure

Grace Truly Is Amazing. It Saved A Wretch Like Me.

Grace.

The word alone is beautiful.  If you look it up in the thesaurus, you see synonyms such as “ compassion, mercy, kindness, and love”.  Likewise, if you look at the antonyms, you see words such as “cruelty, harshness, hatred, and meanness.”

We, as Christ followers, are called to show grace to the world.  That’s right.  We are called to show compassion to those who are hurting, mercy to those who need help, kindness to everyone (including those who aren’t kind to us), and love should exude out of our pores! 

We all sin.  Every day. 

We all have days where others might consider us to be cruel, harsh, hateful, and mean.  You are not alone.  You’re not perfect.  Neither am I.  Neither is anybody else.    We are all so very broken.  Jesus Christ was the one who ever lived on planet Earth and remained sinless.  As far as we may think we have come…we still sin.

Temptation is a daily struggle.  It’s a tug of war challenge to do the right thing, take the right path, say the right words, and it’s human nature to look for the hidden path, the get-even moment or that chance to be devious and take a risk.  Stop beating yourself up when you stumble.  God always knew that you would be tempted to make the wrong decision every once in a while, but He has not turned His back on you.

What if we were really honest with God about our sin?  What if we were humble enough to be open with each other about our brokenness?  Brennan Manning describes this beautifully in his book, All Is Grace.  He writes, “My highest hope is for all of us to stop trying to fool others by appearing to have our act together.”  Are you humble enough to do that?

It is because of Jesus and His sacrifice on the cross that we get to experience grace that truly is amazing!  When we repent with a humble heart and ask Him to forgive us, He does.  How awesome is that?  People that we love are going to sin and hurt us, and we are to forgive it.  If you’ve ever had to do that, you know how hard that can be.  It’s easy to get our defenses up and start judging people who have hurt us, but we can’t.  That is God’s job alone.

Father-

Thank you for your sanctifying grace that saves me every day.  Thank you for allowing me to wake up each day and see Your wonder.  Keep my efforts focused on helping people around me and myself to be better every day and to reflect You in my actions.  Thank you for the powerful shield of grace that protects me from the enemy’s snare.  I am so grateful and unworthy.

Amen.

Passages to Ponder:

Ecclesiastes 7:20- Not a single person on Earth is always good and never sins.

Psalm 37:24- Though they stumble, they will never fall, for the Lord holds them by the hand.

Ephesians 1:7- He is so rich in kindness and grace that He purchased our freedom with the blood of His Son and forgave our sins.

Contributors:  Karen Bromby, Monica Brown, Michele Killion and Kim McClure

June Hope Chest- Hope Leads You to Where You Need to Be by Jennifer Searls

 Jeremiah 29:11- "I know the plans I have for you said the Lord.  Plans to prosper you, not to harm you.  Plans to give you a hope and a future." 

This verse is a verse I often repeat to myself.  My uncle sent it to me when I had just graduated from college.  I was at a crossroads in my life, as many are at such a time.

We spend so much of our lives in the same routine beginning when we are five and starting Kindergarten.  Same thing every year.  Get up and go to school until summer and then get up and do it all over again the next year.  Transitioning from high school to college is a bit of an adjustment, but it is still the same.  Classes and friends.  In my case- a lot of fun.  

Then it ends.  

You graduate and the rest of your life begins.  What?  No promise of the same routine.  

The summer before my junior year, my parents moved to West Virginia.  I continued my education in Connecticut.  My senior year brought some strife between me and my best friend.  It’s a long story, but it involved a guy.  

After I graduated, I left all of my friends and moved to West Virginia with my family.  No friends, no boyfriend, no job and no prospects for the future and I felt lost.

That’s when my uncle sent me this verse.  I wrote it down and hung it on my wall beside my bed so I could be reminded that God did have a future for me.  

He knew how badly I wanted to meet someone I could share my life with.  

He knew how badly I needed friends. 

He knew I needed to find a job that I would find fulfilling.

 I prayed for these things and had hope that they would come my way in His time. 

We often don't want to wait for His time because we have our own timeline.  I know I certainly did.  But, I am also a firm believer in everything happening for a reason and sometimes those reasons aren't visible until later on in life. 

I see it all clearly now, and that verse of hope helped me get through it.  

God had a plan for me.  

Thank goodness my parents moved to West Virginia.  I eventually landed a job at an advertising agency.  There, I met a woman who introduced me to the man who is now my husband.  I also met a girl who continues to be one of my best friends.  It also got me involved in a church where the members would become my family after my parents made yet another move to Ohio.  People I still keep in touch with today; Kim McClure included.  

This church taught me the lesson of forgiveness that allowed me to get back in touch with my best friend.  I am now the godmother to her oldest son and it as if no time has passed.  That story of forgiveness has helped lead others to forgive and renew relationships. 

So, there I was in a new state without anything familiar and no hope of anything new -only to have it bring me to the life I am living today.  

None of it would have happened had my parents not made that move.  My life would be completely different and I cannot imagine my life being different. 

The hope that God gave me through that verse helped me get out of my depression. It helped me get on my feet and try new things and be led to where I needed to be led.  I am not one who loves change, but knowing that my heavenly Father has plans to prosper me and has plans to give me hope and a future makes change a little easier to deal with.  

If you are ever at a crossroads and wondering what the heck is going on in your life- repeat this verse to yourself and know it will all work out in the end because your Father wants to see you succeed and has brought you down the road you are on for a reason.  Just know that God has your back.  He has a purpose even when you can’t see it. 

Will Our Words Lead Others to the Well?

Recently on KLOVE, a caller asked, “What should I do about a coworker who constantly curses around me?”  The DJ responded, “Do nothing.”  He explained that if you say something, all you have done is tell this person that we, as Christians, have rules and you just broke one.  That will not bring them to Jesus.

Words have power.  They can encourage or they can hurt.  They can heal or they can destroy.  

Maybe one of our greatest opportunities to witness God’s love to others is through the words we use.  Jesus told us to love other people, and that’s how they will come to know Him.  So often our lack of righteousness comes from speaking too quickly and harshly, making others think that we are judging and/or condemning them because of their behavior. 

No one wants to be criticized. Perhaps the kind words we say to someone are they only positive ones they hear on a given day.  Critical words can deflate any progress being made toward a goal, and cause people to throw their hands up and believe that they can’t do it.  It is important that we encourage unbelievers through our words and by showing love. 

This is illustrated beautifully in John 4:6-42 through Jesus and His encounter with the woman at the well.  Jesus had been travelling and was tired from a long walk.  He sat beside the well around noon, and a Samaritan woman came to retrieve water.  Jesus asked her for a drink of water, which surprised her.  There had been a long-standing animosity between the Jewish people and the Samaritans, and therefore she couldn’t believe that this Jewish man would speak to her.  He went on to reveal to her that He knew that she was living in sin, but that He was the Messiah and He had come to save everyone regardless of their race, social position, or past sins. 

He spared her dignity and dealt with her tenderly when confronting her with her sin.  As a result, she shared her experience with others and many in the town became believers.  Had Jesus spoken to her in a condescending or harsh manner, the outcome probably would have been a lot different.  He gave her merciful words that healed her soul, instead of pointing out her flaws which might have put her in defense mode.

How many people would tell the woman that she has to get her life straightened out before she can begin to follow Christ?  How many times have people used it as an excuse, saying they aren’t ready because they need to change first?  That isn’t true!  Change isn’t a prerequisite. On the contrary, it will come as a result of following Christ and allowing Him to transform their lives.

Susan shares this story..

“Loving the unlovable is sometimes a difficult thing to do.  I recall one time several years ago, a lady who worked at a local strip club started coming to our church after the youth went through the neighborhood passing out information regarding our church and service times.  One morning, there she was...alcohol on her breath, but nicely dressed... an African American woman with pink hair.  Though there were a few second glances, I must say, she was welcomed with open arms.  People accepted her, embraced her and made her feel welcomed.  She would often frequent the altar to pray, but would go back out and do the same thing week after week. 

I do not know what happened to her.  I think she was evicted and had to move.  But my hope is that the love she saw during those several months by people who loved her without condemnation, somehow caused her to change her heart and come into a relationship with Jesus Christ.  We never know who the Lord will send our way, and we need to be ready at all times, as I Peter 3:15 says, to give the reason for the hope we have in us through Jesus Christ.”

Do you and I love unconditionally?  Are we prepared to give an answer to the "whosoevers" we encounter? Will our words lead others to the well where they will meet Jesus? Let's love the way Jesus loved.  If we can do that with the best of our abilities, the world will be a better place...one person at a time.

Passages to Ponder:

Colossians 4:6- Let your conversation be gracious and attractive so that you will have the right response for everyone.

James 1:19-20- Understand this my dear brothers and sisters:  You all must be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to get angry.  Human anger does not produce the righteousness God desires.

Proverbs 16:24- Kind words are like honey- sweet to the soul and healthy for the body.

Contributors:  Karen Bromby, Susan Haynes, Michele Killion, Kim McClure, Shawna Nelson and Kristy Tolley

That Girl

That Girl..

The young one.  She’s surrounded by a sexual culture and she’s confused.

It’s in her music, on her tv, and any other form of media that she’s used.

She’s heard about the harm that drugs and alcohol can bring

But has she heard us speak about promiscuity and its harsh, cold sting?

That Girl..

She sees the up side of it in comedies on the screen.

She needs to know the down side too, the side not often seen.

When that boy tells her he loves her, but to stay together sex is a must

She needs someone to talk to her about the difference between love and lust.

That Girl…

She posts photos of herself online that wouldn’t be allowed in your average magazine.

She’s addicted to the “likes”, and the “favorites” she gets when they’re seen.

She craves love, so she keeps on playing this game

But she deserves to know that sex is not love, they’re not one and the same.

That Girl…

She needs to hear these things even though it might be hard

We need to get our heads out of the sand and stop playing the “I can’t talk about that” card

Just because you might have been That Girl some years ago

Doesn’t mean that you can’t help her by sharing what you know.

That Girl…

She needs to be inspired and encouraged about her worth

To know that through Christ, she can experience a rebirth.

He forgives.  He forgets.  He does it endlessly.

His love, grace, and mercy were proven at Calvary.

That Girl…

She needs to know that God sees what lies ahead,

That He talks to her daily as that little voice inside her head.

He has the power to help her stand strong

Will you be vulnerable and honest enough to help her along?

Our young women need us to step up and speak out. 

According to Covenant Eyes, 68% of young men and 18% of young women view pornography at least once per week.  The American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers reports that 56% of divorce cases involve one party having an “obsessive interest” in pornographic websites.  Their research shows that prolonged exposure to pornography leads to:

• ·         A diminished trust between intimate couples
• ·         Cynicism that love is needed between sexual partners
• ·         A belief that marriage is sexually confining
• ·         Lack of attraction to taking care of family

Those bullet points sound eerily like the typical view of our society toward sex and marriage.  Even when not actively involved in viewing pornography, sex is permeating our media and influencing our values.

I pray that we all have the courage to help That Girl see beyond it.

Passages to Ponder:

I Corinthians 6:18- Run from sexual sin!  No other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does.  For sexual immorality is a sin against your own body.

Isaiah 61:3-4- To all who mourn in Israel, He will give a crown of beauty for ashes, a joyous blessing instead of mourning, a festive praise instead of despair. In their righteousness, they will be like great oaks that the Lord has planted for His own glory.  They will rebuild the ancient ruins, repairing cities destroyed long ago.  They will revive them, though they have been deserted for many generations.

I Thessalonians 4:3- God’s will is for you to be holy, so stay away from all sexual sin.

Contributors:  Karen Bromby, Monica Brown, Susan Haynes, Michele Killion, Kim McClure and Brooke Radnor