I never thought I would get divorced. I married my college sweetheart, and knew it was a mistake from the start. Unfortunately, I wasn’t willing to admit it to myself until we had two children and had been married for 9 years. It was a failure I had a difficult time swallowing.
Out of all of my cousins, I am the only divorcee. My parents (before my mother’s death) were married nearly 56 years. God was probably screaming in my ear before I got married, but I just knew I could make it work. Well, the joke was on me.
God has always been a part of my life. I was raised going to church, by parents who didn’t preach at me (we didn’t say grace or read the Bible at home), but rather lived by example. We always knew God was around us, never doubted for a minute (at least I didn’t).
This is not to say my faith hasn’t been challenged. The biggest test was my son developing a potentially life-threatening condition when he was a toddler. I never doubted God’s presence through all of the ups and downs. I have seen the gifts he has given me. My daughter was born right before my son was diagnosed. Had I not gotten pregnant when I did, she never would’ve happened.
My other gift from Him is my husband, Brian.
At the age of 34, I decided to try dating again (I’d been divorced about a year). This time around, a relationship was going to complement me, not complete me. The big question was how to meet guys. I lived in a college town, so I wasn’t about to go cruise the bars for a date. I grew up in the church I attended, so every guy there was like family. I eventually did what happens in the 21st century: I tried online dating. That is how I met Brian. He contacted me through an online dating site. I instantly recognized him from his profile picture because I had graduated with his sister. As soon as I met him, I knew I was in trouble.
Brian is NOTHING like my ex-husband, and I couldn’t be happier. Like I do, he feels our meeting was probably divinely inspired. He loves me for who I am and is a genuinely nice guy. We’ve been together more than 10 years, and my stomach still does a little flip every time I see him. I never knew I could feel like this about someone, and I thank God every day for Brian. There are times I want to kick myself for entering into my first marriage, knowing it was wrong. But all those decisions I made then (by the grace of God) have turned into an unbelievable amount of happiness.